Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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