I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?