Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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