Banned from zoo.
Again?
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
