Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize