seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
