So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
