my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
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