youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
