Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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