and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
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Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one acquire holy water?
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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