Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
