Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
