You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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