no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
