I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
that's an acceptable place to lick
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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