And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
