and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize