I just made out with a guy for $7.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
