I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
