i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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