guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Even my vagina gasped.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Randomize
