then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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