it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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