:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize