All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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