she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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