great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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