just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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