I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
