wrigley field is MILF paradise
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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