oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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