White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
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Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
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I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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