Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
