Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
