yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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