Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
