Im at strip club and am horny
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
