Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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