Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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