He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Randomize