I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Dicks are not precious.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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