I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize