Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I think I just sharted jello shots
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
