You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
