Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
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He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
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I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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