Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
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