WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
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