Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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