just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
